don’t give up
you’re not the only one
don’t give up
no reason to be ashamed
don’t give up
you still have us
don’t give up now
we’re proud of who you are
don’t give up
you know it’s never been easy
don’t give up
’cause I believe there’s a place
there’s a place where we belong–Peter Gabriel, Don’t Give Up
We actors love the thrill of getting out there, updating the resume, prepping songs and monologues, being loose, stretched, relaxed, passionate, primed and ready for action. To act. To audition.
We don’t love…to not get the part.
Auditioning is not just a job interview, you know? It’s putting your true, authentic Self on the line. And then dealing with what we might initially perceive as rejection.
The truth is, we don’t know what is going through the casting director’s head. We can’t read her/his mind. Maybe the person who got the part was simply the right height. Maybe the stars lined up for them that day. Maybe they brought it.
Did you bring it?
The only part of the audition process we have any control over is ourselves. Our preparation, followed by our being fully present and passionate the day of the audition. Practice being fully present and accessible and open. Often. Like, all the time, if you can bear to.
We will drive ourselves crazy if we try to compare our talents, our energy, our delivery with everyone else’s.
How do we pick up the pieces? Don’t take it personally. AUGH! How the heck can we accomplish that?
You have three options: Stop. Keep doing the same thing. Or, push yourself further.
Be yourself. Your true self. Here is the paradox: Your initial reaction is to close yourself off. But you’ve got to put yourself out there more. If you can be more vulnerable, go there. If you can strip your soul more bare, wear your heart on your sleeve more openly, yearn more strongly and doggedly fight for what you want until there’s nothing left? Do that.
Deliver. Dig deep. Wish and pine and rant and scream and wail and fight. It’s all you can do. Go waaaaaay outside your comfort zone; turn it inside out and stomp on it. It’s a cushion, a guard, a wall, self-preservation.
What the hell are we preserving ourselves for? Don’t save yourself, preserve yourself, pickle yourself, protect, diminish, hide, any of it. Put yourself out there. Big time. It’s our job as actors to go there.
If every actor can go there and do that, we have what is no longer the exception — we have universal brilliance, fabulous-ness, astoundingly heartfelt work. In the meantime, stand out. Be exceptional. Do the unexpected. Be uncommon. Embody your unique self, and fight like hell for what you want.
Put your whole Self in. The director wants to see commitment, love, presence. There is nothing more you can give than one hundred percent of yourself. If after all of that, you don’t get the role, it’s not about you. Trust. Have faith. Know that it wasn’t the right job at the right time. Something else will come along that is even better. It has happened to me scores of time, without exception.
Be proud. Be strong. Be brave. Put yourself out there. Even more. Every time.
Your faith will be rewarded.
Coralie Cederna Johnson March 22, 2012
Wow! This is amazing and so true! I’ve been there; we’ve all been there. If you don’t put yourself out there, you’ll never experience these lessons in life…and more, you’ll never reach your highest dreams!
Thanks, Carrie!
Brilliant!
Autumn Rose Wood April 4, 2012
Your beautifully written blog reminds me of a poem I wrote. Below is a short revised rhyming version
External Soul Searching
Around the round table sit not knights of old, but diverse writers with wisdom of gold. Will I provoke laughter with my silly tomes, or will I, in tears of shame, continue my roams? Looking for a place to belong.
Carrie April 6, 2012
Thank you for sharing your writing, Autumn! We shall inspire each other.
Autumn Rose Wood April 4, 2012
Thank you!
Aaron C. Wade March 12, 2014
It’s never easy handling news that you didn’t make it. I’ve learned that handling a rejection time over and over can really help build up a positive approach. I can’t remember who said it but the goal is to fail upward. Learn from mistakes and always improve. A lot of times a rejection can be the best thing to happen. I’ve been turned away from things that ended up being a complete train wreck. Just remember that there are limitless opportunities out there.